3 quotes for the Odd Character

I wanted to make a post full post of good-sounding quotes for a story that I’ve found and managed to actually write down over the past few years, but realized that half the list I recorded is on my laptop, and the other half on my PC. Guess that means I’ll just have something to blog about next week then!

            Well I’ll get straight to it.      

            1. “Even when I lose, I win, because I never lose the lesson.” (Great for an upbeat character)

             2. “Undue concern for women is what leads to contempt of them.” (Very philosophical)

            3. (And my favorite) “Secrets are like cockroaches. If you have a secret you don’t want to share, people seem to gather around and crawl all over it.” (I imagine a woman saying this last one with her lip curled in bitter contempt).

            And that’s all for now. Sometime next week I’ll have to dive into the madness that’s my laptop’s folder organizational system and give some more.

Binge Reading

Binge Reading.

It’s what I’ve been doing for the past week to catch up on the few weeks prior that I’ve found lame excuses not to read often because I was, well, let’s face it, lazy. Anyway, upon reading two books simultaneously and an interesting article on “Character Driven Plotting,” I’ve started a new word document labeled “Memorable tips to always remember as a Writer.” I have three tips so far, and would like to share them here.

1. Drive home a character’s personality by the actions they take. This is especially true in first person where you don’t need every thought they have, rather, the things they notice, the things they react to first and how they react, tell so much more.

2. A scene can be set by merely a few words. Example: someone idly played with their eggs with their fork (invoking the idea of breakfast, which is usually held in the dining room or kitchen).

3. (this is my favorite so far) The reason you don’t start a story at the end or the most climatic point is context. With proper context, the importance of the event is overshadowed by the importance of the event to the characters of your story.

That’s all I’ve got so far, but as I continue to read more often and more carefully, I’m sure this list will grow. I imagine myself lost at some point during writing, and looking back on this growing list to re-align my brain.

Accents

I realized I haven’t posted in a few weeks. I guess that’s what happens when everything else important in the world knocks on your door and steals your time away.

But let’s move towards the present, shall we? This week, I’ve been working on accents, or rather one accent in particular. You see, I’ve grown tired of all my characters sounding like middle-class young white men, so I figured an accent will mask my problem. Well, turns out my new venture with accents actually fixed the problem! You see, when I start writing in an accent, I’m constantly reminded of where my character has come from. Case-in-point, I’ve begun writing in the POV of a female farm girl and (yes, I’m skirting by the fact that I’m writing in a female POV for the first time, that’ll be another post) have found that I can always tell what she’s going to do next or how she’ll react by how and where she was raised. The accent acts as an anchor, pulling me back toward her personality which, as many personalities are, formed by her upbringing and surroundings.

If nothing else, it’s a powerful writing exercise, not to mention a frustrating one. I mean, it’s not like they have guides out there for every single word to accent when writing dialogue! Thank God I found an online book where I could just CTRL F a character’s name and copy every accented word they spoke.

Walk the Plank

I’ve talked about this before, but experiencing life is pretty much the perfect place to find any kind of story material. Example: (and this is a case in humor) I was out and about for once with a friend and I was itching to do something different. He knew I didn’t drink, so he suggested that. When we got to the bar, his first question was “do you like drinks or do you like beer?” Personally I think beer tastes disgusting, no matter how many ‘hops’ or what have you is put in it. So I said I liked drinks, and he just shrugged his shoulders and let me order something called a “Walk the Plank.” Now, being an inexperienced drinker, one would imagine me smart enough not to order something that sounded like someone being thrown to the perilous seas, but hey, I wanted something new.

I wonder now if my friend got the irony of it all.

Half way through the drink my head was hot and I couldn’t seem to stop myself from laughing at the tiniest thing. I wasn’t drunk – I knew that from seeing what other people looked like when they were drunk – but I was… loopy, and I’m pretty sure the grande nacho platter I ordered was a result of the alcohol. The fact that I downed ¾ of the plate designed to serve 3-4 people (my friend, by the way, counts as .5, but he ate more than his fill too) is a testament to how ‘silly’ I was.

When I finished my drink, which I took down very slowly, I noticed some guy get served this tall, tall glass of beer, and I asked my friend “how can that guy take all that liquor?”

“It’s because its beer, Kyle. That much beer probably has a fraction of the alcohol in what you just drank.”

And look! I learned something new. Could I make this into a story? Sure I could! Just add a few twists, a few turns, a few perils, a villain or three, and bam, you’ve got a story. The point is, when I write, if I need to, I can draw from this very experience and add all sorts of flavor, detail, and realism to my story.

Jolly Good Day to You Too

            So I went into work today and the new girl greeted me with this huge grin and a hand held high, ready to be high-fived. I indulged her and she jumped around all excited-like.

            “What’s the occasion?” I asked.

            “Don’t you know what today is?” She practically buzzed with enthusiasm.

            It took me a moment. “Oh yeah, it’s Valentine’s day.”

            “No silly,” she shook her head, “it’s single’s awareness day!”

            F#@&*@&$

            “Oh, so it is…”

            “And you know what the acronym for single’s awareness day is? S.A.D.”

            And that was my day for the rest of the day.

            Sorry dedicated readers, no lesson on writing today, just jolly old throat strangling, heart crushing, stomach pitting… joy! Joy all day. Joy all flippin day long.

The Mighty Coward

            Last week I said I’d talk about one-on-one combat strategies I read from both the “Book of Five Rings” by Myamoto Musashi and “The Art of War” by Sun Tzu, but something super important came up. Instead, I’ll leave you with the one good tactic that I still remember without having to bury myself in those books again: when fighting, keep the sun at your back. Simple, right? And incredibly effective. Ever play volleyball with the sun in your eye? How about baseball? Hell even driving is hard when the sun’s glare is pounding down on you, so imagine how much harder it is to attack or defend when your vision is obscured. If you can control the fight so that you will always have the sun at your back, then someone with less skill can defeat someone with more skill.

            Anyway, the important thing that came up happened last Sunday. I took a loooong walk around my neighborhood, one because it’s already Spring in Arizona and it was wonderfully sunny, and two because I needed to clear my head about starting a new story.

            I know I’ve talked about a few beginnings in my past posts, slaying gods and all, but I ended up doing what I always do when I start a story: I copped out. I made a bland, generic hero character with no flaws and who had little to no idea about the outside world. I even made the back-story justify his lack of experience!

            If I went back to my older posts, I probably complained about this same exact thing at some point. Difference between now and then is I have a better idea of what makes a good character.

            So, for the real reason you’re spending your time reading this blog, here’s a few tips on making good characters good.

            1. Good characters are flawed. They make mistakes. They forget things. They screw up when it matters most and they succeed when it matters least.

            2. Cowards make excellent characters

            3. Selfish cowards make even better characters.

            4. Heroes are great and all, but you have to remember the image of strength and bravery can be easily shattered by the faults that lay just beneath the skin.

             And there’s a few dozen more, but hey, I’m new at this, gimme a break.

Six Word Short Story

Ernest Hemmingway did a six word short story: “For sale, baby shoes, never worn.”

Coulda been a miscarriage with his wife, coulda been just some baby shoes that went out of style.

Mine’s a tad more forward:

“Super headache, haven’t slept, appealing bed.”

Goodnight everybody, more on the art of war next week, this time focusing on one-on-one fights.

P.S.

Something tells me I should have been named the snarky dwarf… I seem to be getting sarcastic as of late.

Disclaimer: This is not an official challenge for the title of the Snarky Dwarf

Total War

            Today we’ll be talking about war, with a focus on large scale feudal combat.

            I recently purchased a game called “Total War Shogun II” which takes you through a simulation of the Sengoku Jidai, or the “Warring States Period” that lasted between 15^th and 17^th century Japan. You get to play as a number of different clans of your choice, all vying for the power of the Shogunate, which was basically the seat of a dictator. Although in our timeline it was the Tokugawa clan who took the seat of power in Japan, in this game, if you’re good enough, you can make anyone win.

            But that’s enough of a history lesson today. You wanted to learn about writing after all, right? Well take note, because Total War Shogun was the most realistic large-scale war game I’ve played yet, and after comparing notes and strategies with the infamous “Book of Five Rings” by Japanese legend Myamoto Musashi and “The Art of War” by Sun Tzu, this game made sure to make everything as real as possible.

            So, without further ado, here’s a few tips on large-scale feudal combat I learned from both the game and the books.

            1. Moral is one of the most important things a commander needs to maintain in order to be victorious. When Frank Herbert stressed that “fear was the mind-killer,” he wasn’t joking. Men who rout are men who fear for their own lives. They abandon not only their posts, but their comrades as well. They are cowardly men, and it’s a commander’s job to place his men accordingly so that the fear of loss is never within a man’s eyesight.

            2. Terrain is your best friend. Sun Tzu described nine types of ground, dispersive, frontier, key, open, focal, serious, difficult, encircled, and desperate. Dispersive ground is fighting within one’s own territory, while frontier is edging into the enemy’s. Ground that is equally advantageous to both parties is key ground, while ground that is equally accessible is considered open. When a state is surrounded by three other states, the territory is called focal, which is key to capturing in order to attack neighboring states. Any enemy territory that is delved deep into away from all allies and support is called serious ground. Marching through swamps, marshes, or any land where the going is hard, it is considered difficult ground, and where the paths are narrow and the ways out are torturous, it is encircled ground, for it is a place where a small force can take a larger one with ease. Any ground where an army may survive only with courage is desperate ground. Knowing which type of ground your on is key to strategizing your next move. You don’t want to be caught in a fight when your troop’s feet are caught in a boggy marsh, nor do you want to put your back to a wall without a place to run.

            3. Lastly, take advantage of hills and high places. They are places easily defended, and if one needs to charge, charging downhill is much easier than charging up.

            There are dozens more lessons, but I don’t have enough space here, but keep in mind that any commander must consider all the aspects of war, not just the one or two I’ve seen some writers mention when they wrote about generals.

Life is Rough

Growing up is rough.

Rather, I should say that working life is rough and acclimating from a life of relative ease is a pain in the ass.

I recently started a new job (I won’t say where) and it’s a kind of place where I have to greet every customer with a smile, stand on my feet for eight hour intervals, and can quite easily cause truckloads of strife for everyone if I mess up on even the smallest detail. I have to pay attention and be aware at all times, and always, and I mean always, stay focused on my task.

I work around thirty to thirty-five hours a week, which is a good transition from zero to zero hours a week, but it’s hard you know? All that standing, all that talking, all that smiling. I used to just sit around and do homework, read, write, and play video games. You’d wonder why I even get up at eight in the morning to go to work.

Well, the answer is pretty simple. I do it for the pay. I do it because I have a 15k school loan to pay off, and I do it because I’m not about to be called a slacker by my parents whom graciously let me live in their home still.

In other words, I work because I have to.

I may not like it all the time, but the reward is worth it.

Copy/paste a generic young man from a generic fantasy novel and insert here. Poor guy’s livin the easy life (or as easy as it can get) on a farm and bam he’s suddenly got to go on a maaaaagical journey to save the world. He may not like trudging through poisonous swamps or fending off great red dragons on a mountaintop with a toothpick of a sword and a flimsy wooden shield, but he has to, else everyone he knows and loves will die.

My situation may not be so drastic, but I think I’m starting to get what every coming-of-age man eventually realizes when life slaps them in the face; I’ve got to go to work today so I can pay my bills, feed myself, and not sleep in a cardboard box tonight.

Graduation and that One memorable moment

            Ahh graduation. The sweet smell of victory.

            It took me six years to complete college, six years to finally be able to walk the line through the ASU arena, to stand clad in maroon and gold among my fellow graduates. Aside from waking up on the wrong side of the bed in the morning, (I had to get up at 6am! The ceremony was at 8!) everything went smoothly. I saw a few familiar faces, got to shake some prestigious individual’s hands, waved to some teachers, and, oh yeah, I was the first person to receive their diploma! Well the thing you put your diploma in after eight-to-ten weeks anyway.           

            But first! I was first!

            Since this is a writing blog and all, I know I can’t just write about my amazing accomplishments and my amazing life, (< — this was sarcasm, for those of whom do not understand comedy) so let’s take a note on a lesson in writing.

            My old creative writing teacher told me that a good short story told of one important moment in someone’s life, whether good or bad, dangerous or exciting. For example. The short story I just finished writing a few days back was the tale of a young farmer who danced with his goddess of the harvest. It was the one time in his life, and probably the last as far as the legends go, that his fingers would touch divinity, and that’s pretty damn important.

            Example number two is of course all about me.

            First, Rochelle was the nice lady of the fifth floor in ASU’s English department, and I’ve met her a few times in the past. After embarrassingly exchanging shoes with my father, (why I decided to wear white cross trainers is beyond me) I was around eighth in line for my school of English. Seeing how early I got there, I wasn’t surprised. After chatting with a few fellow students, Rochelle, who was to be the flag bearer for our line, recognized me and called me over. She then handed me this little green slip that had the worlds “First” printed in big bold letters across it and whispered “hey, you wana be the one to lead your line?”

            I nodded my head vigorously.

            Come on. How often do you get to lead your entire school of English’s line to the stage? Once. That’s how often you get the chance.

            So I took the little green piece of paper and stood proud at the front of the line.

            Then came the tension.

            I learned pretty quick she hadn’t received any training for being a flag bearer.

            I broke out into nerves, spit-firing questions like, “how will I know where to go?” She was the one who would be directing our line. I would be following her, but I would have to split off at some point. I wondered to myself, am I gonna be that one guy who messes up and leads everyone astray? Being the leader of your line means you lead the line, or in plainer terms, they follow my every step.

            Long story short, the time came and there were all sorts of people there to guide my way. But hey, who was I to know? I’ve never been to a graduation ceremony like that before. It could have been super formal or… something. Point is I was afraid, and needlessly at that. Ah, and to clarify, there were multiple “schools of” walking that day, School of English, School of Global yada yada, and I just didn’t lead my line, my line was the first line, so in essence, I led all the lines. And even though in the end it doesn’t matter, even though, if you think about it, it’s pretty inconsequential, I was the first to walk up there and receive my diploma-holder thing.

            How awesome is that?