Once again the 7 Evil Dwarves gathered around the Swamp Gas Fire and exchanged annual gifts of merriment. Not only is it the one time of the year we cut Smokey a break and bring in our own nourishment, but we also drag along significant others. Since the Prankster Duo was busy gutting bits of wire and plastic with other miniature humans, my knight in slightly muddy armor and I loaded up with essentials and headed out to trek on over to Smokey’s place.
Me-”Did you get the pies?”
Him-”Yeah. You didn’t have to make them did you?”
Me *snort*- “Please, if the other six wanted to experience a near death experience they’d go taunt Eerie’s Zombies. I picked those up from Knaves’ End.”
Him *looking very relieved*–”Great.”
We added a couple of new cold steel blades to our outfits, grab the gaily wrapped gifts, leave the hellhound half a boar and some water, set the perimeter defenses and headed down the road. We passed Sunny’s place where a veil of mist swirled in a thick mass. Poor Sunny, we’ve been trying to get supplies through, but the black hole of chaos is holding her under siege. We’re going to have to send in a search and rescue team soon and drag her back out.
The cackling of Mischievous’ laughter rings out from above while the moans and shrieks of the Swamp Thing trail behind him. I can’t quite make out what he has clutched in his talons, but it’s shiny. One day, the Swamp Thing is going to use him as her Thanksgiving centerpiece.
We pass by the Filet Your Own Deli where my Muse is enjoying her time off and playing a game with the white haired guy sporting a tool belt. I can see the flash of blades in-between the smack of cards being slapped upside foreheads. There’s a hungry, evil smile gracing her pale face that sends shivers down my spine, but the old guy just bares his teeth, takes a swig from the old flask at his side and flicks another battered card on the scarred table. I shake my head as we continue on.
The snap of leather snaking through the air sends me into an instinctive crouch. Belatedly, I realize that Snarky is just testing out her new bullwhip. Grumbling softly, I straighten and get a good look at her newest accessory. Purple…niiiicceee. I might have to find out where she got that one.
Snarky *checking out the pies in knight in slightly muddy armor arms*–”That better be chocolate.”
Me-”As if there’s any other kind.”
Snarky *narrowing eyes*- “You have two?”
Me – “Nah, offering second option for those of us who OD on sugar today. Sugar Free Apple.”
Snarky *waving a dismissive hand*–”I’ll stick with chocolate.” A sharp squeal comes from inside her house, and the smile that appears is the same one I’ve seen right before she hands me back my drafts dripping in red. “I need to go check on the ham. See you soon!”
A little further down the road, we pull up short as we watch Eerie fighting over a bottle of Werewolf Hunter’s Moon red with a fairly persistent pair of Zombie twins.
Eerie–”Let go you brainless lump of flesh! Even if your brain was working you couldn’t appreciate this vintage.”
It’s entertaining watching the on-going struggle between my short friend and the Brainless Wonder Duo. The scuff of boots against gravel announce the arrival of Quirky, Jedi and her other half.
Quirky–”Who’s winning?”
Me-”Not sure yet.”
Jedi-”I’ll put ten on the twins.”
Quirky-”You’re on.”
Me *thinking about the last time Eerie got cornered by the horde*–”I think I’ll just watch.”
Eerie–”A little help here!”
Knight in slightly muddy armor–”I don’t know, this is kind of fun to watch.”
Before anyone else can move, a black feather dive bomber manages to distract Twin 1 by introducing talons to eyeballs. I grimace. Those stains are never going to come out.
Me-”Have you considered enrolling your horde in Zombie training courses, Eerie?”
Eerie-”What are they going to teach them? They already know drop dead, gnaw and claw.”
I take the pies from my knight–”We’re going to be late. Go help.”
He takes out his shiny new sword and cuts the legs out from under Twin 2. Literally.
Eerie stumbles back and cradles his bottle carefully. Smoothing down one of many flyway strands of hair, he’s all dignity. “Thank you.”
We make it to Smokey’s door without further incidents and his lovely Italian counterpart welcomes us into their home. The next few hours pass in a blissful haze of food, friends and laughter. Gifts are exchanged, stories are shared and barbs are traded.
Remember during this busy season–this is what makes the holidays–laughter, love and friendship.
Treasure yours as I do mine!
Merry Holidays everyone!
Wicked
