THE WIND THROUGH THE KEYHOLE

Greetings and salutations again loyal blog readers,

As you can see I’m packing up.  I’ve had no time to write during my stay at the Werewolf Monastery, and quite frankly the monks are getting on my nerves.  I may have over stayed my welcome.  I think I’ve fixed about everything they could find and I installed new accent lighting in the gardens.  It looks very nice, but that’s not what I meant to do with my time.  The other reason for my sudden departure is I haven’t heard from Mischievous Raven and that worries me.  As you know he was abducted a while back and held for ransom by The Three Misfiteers.  Although I fulfilled my part of the bargain to obtain his release, which required me to submit their novel out to literary agents.  I admit that I’ve slacked off for the past two months.  And those three are not above taking my good friend and confidant again.  So I’m heading back to The Swamp today to check on my friend.  My muse has the armored Humvee here and he’s agreed to drop me off.  That saves me a trip through the Impenetrable Forrest.

Today we’re going to talk about Stephen King’s most recent work, The Wind Through The Keyhole.  I openly admit to being a huge fan of Mr. King.  Also known as The Master around The Swamp.  The critics were pretty cool on this book.  One said, it was disappointing because it did not further the Gunslinger story at all.  While it is true that it does nothing to further the series, it is a great tale in its own right.  The Wind Through the Keyhole is a story within a story within another story.  And while it takes its place right in the middle of the Gunslinger series, it gives some insights into the characters that we already know and have come to love.  Roland and his ka-tet– Jake, Susanna, Eddie and Oy, the billy-bumbler have to hunker down to ride out a storm.  To pass the time Roland tells them a story about himself as a young gunslinger, in which he tells a young boy a story to keep his mind off the difficult task Roland has put upon him.

The tale itself (without the set up) is a wonderful read and demonstrates why SK is one of the best (if not thee best) writer of his generation.  We are transported back to mid-world when Roland was a brand new gunslinger.  SK’s feel for this alternate world and his ability to share it with the reader is wondrous.  I found myself there, next to Roland as he takes on one of his first challenges as a gunslinger.

Isn’t that why we read fiction in the first place.  Keyhole is a character driven ticket to another world.  Characters we love, and some we hate, and still others we love to hate.  By arranging black letters on a white background, SK creates emotional responses in us, as we lay safely in bed turning pages until the wee hours of the morning.  Who could ask for more.  Thanks Stephen.

“Time is a keyhole, he thought as he looked up at the stars.  Yes, I think so.  We sometimes bend and peer through it.  And the wind we feel on our cheeks when we do–the wind that blows through the keyhole–is the breath of all the living universe”

That short excerpt speaks for itself.

I love reading, which is probably why I write.  Or maybe it’s the other way around.  Either way, if you’re a huge fan of The Master then reviews are meaningless and you’ve already read or are planning to read this book.  If on the other hand, you are a sometimes reader of SK, don’t let the critics steer you away from this powerful story.  By a ticket and enjoy your journey into mid-world.

Todays quote comes from G.K. Chesterton:

“Literature is a luxury; fiction is a necessity.”

Thanks for stopping by,

Write on,

Errie

The Joy of Writing

Muse and I working in the Library

Still hanging out here at the Monastery, I’m getting a little homesick for the Swamp though.  As I mentioned before, cell service is bad up here, and my cell carrier, Surprison’s slogan is “He hears me, he hears me not.”  They are the undisputed champs of dropped calls.  So I’ve sent Mischievous Raven back to gather some news.  I hope he stays away from C. Rock Adile.  Those two really don’t get on well.  When he and Mischievous get together it gets ugly fast.  Of course Wicked has her eye on a new set of

The Great Hall

boots courtesy of CR’s hide.  Come to think of it not many folks around the The Swamp like CR at all.  I’m sure Mischievous will return soon with the goings on.

On the local front the Monks have been very busy in the wine cellar of late.  They seem very excited about something.  It will be difficult to beat last years bold red wine Exsanguinate The Halls.  It had a bloody nose and a delightful coppery aftertaste.  Last years holiday white was less successful, Infected Wound, it had a rancid nose and laid heavily on the palate.  The good news is with the Monks scurrying up and down the cellar steps we’ve had the place to ourselves.

My Muse and I are revisiting a story I started a while back and then set aside because we got caught up in the editing craze that was going around.  You may remember my post from Feb. 10. Editing.  Everybody’s doing it, doing it doing it.  I’m still working on submissions of my completed novel The Three Misfiteers.  I’m sure some intelligent, good-looking, industrious agent will want it for their portfolio soon.  In the mean time,  back to writing some original material.

This is always the most fun a writer can have.  First drafts (at least mine) are full of interesting characters with enchanting repartee.  Of corse much of that will have to go in the second draft because it is rife with mistakes, clichés, and misused words.  But when the characters get in my head and take the place over, its chaos at it’s most wonderful.  So I think I will cut our meeting a little short this week so I can get back to it.

This weeks quote comes from Joseph Conrad

“Of all the inanimate objects, of all men’s creations, books are the nearest to us for they contain our very thoughts, our ambitions, our indignations, our illusions, our fidelity to the truth, and our persistent leanings to error. But most of all they resemble us in their precious hold on life.”

Write On,

Eerie

Meanwhile Back at the Monastery

Greetings and Salutations Glorious Readers of the Blog,

As you can see Mischievous Raven and I have finally been granted entrance into the Monastery of the Werewolf Monks.  I know, right it’s pretty cool if you haven’t been before.  Let me show you around, Brother Lon will accompany us but he cannot talk, there is always a vow of silence after the full moon hunt.  Lead on Brother Lon.  This is the library and the thing the Monastery is most well-known for.  As you can see it is packed with books and scrolls going back thousands of years.  The best stuff is up ahead here.  Scholars from all over the world come here to study about the strange and sometimes horrible creatures that roam  the planet right under the noses of the unsuspecting general public.  This is where I did my research on Vampires.  They have an entire section on Vlad The Impaler.  Rumor has it that Vlad himself comes over to review the library from time to time.  You know of course he stays at the Dakota right off Central Park most of the year.  He does, I’m not kidding.  You should come back and spend some time here.  Libraries are the best places to meet interesting people.  Down those steps is where the wines are made.  You can only go there once a year when they turn out their new vintages.  They have a big tasting it’s a regular who’s who event, very A list.  The rest of the year it’s off-limits.  No, I’ve never been, I’m sure it’s a clerical over site.  That’s the chapel,  up here are the quarters for the monks.  The guest rooms are on the next couple floors.  Above that is the observatory where they plot the moon and star movements.  You can visit Brother Al up there after sundown and he’ll show you around.  You can even have a look through the peeper if you like.  Brother Lon is directing us toward the dining room.  It must be dinner time.  Go have a bite I’ll see you later.  I’m going to catch up my muse and go over a few things we wrote last week before he ditched me.

I just wrote a short piece which came right out of nowhere for me.  The strange thing about the story is, it has no dialogue.  That in itself isn’t strange, but it is strange for me.  I’ve been told that I have a gift for dialogue.  So to write a piece without a single spoken word for over 2,500 words was really odd for me.  It got me to thinking about what makes dialogue flow.  Now if I have a gift it is God-given and not something I learned, and my friends will tell you I was out to lunch when God was giving such gifts as Grammar, Spelling, Point of View, and Tenses, among other things.  But they seem to agree I do pretty decent dialogue.

This is what came to me,( totally my opinion here folks).  I thinks that when writing is flowing for me I’m in the characters head.  Almost like a movie is playing out the scene.  I hear what the character is saying and it comes out in his/her voice not mine.  And if I’m really there I hear the replies from whoever as if I am the character.  This makes the other voices authentic because they have to sound right to the POV character or I get pulled out of the scene.  When I struggle the most is when I’m not hearing what my character is hears.  This all sounds very WOO-WOO, but it’s the best way I describe what happens.  When I put myself in the scene and hear what is said I know if it sounds right or not.  One trick I use to help with this is I read my dialogue back out loud.  I’ll never be one who reads for audio books, but I try to put inflection in the speech.  In effect give the character a voice, not one I hear in my head but actually hear.  I am but a lowly scribbler and I don’t want this to sound like a lecture so I’m going to quit here.  If you have some thoughts on dialogue send me a comment.  And if you struggle with getting your characters to sound natural try hearing it, listen for the nuances.  As is our custom here at the swamp I’ll leave you with this appropriate quote.

When writing a novel a writer should create living people; not characters. A character is a caricature.

Ernest Hemingway 

Write On,

Eerie

It’s Amazing What A Little Time Off Will Bring…

I came back to the Swamp on Sunday after spending the weekend with Snarky at the RWA Desert Dreams conference down in the Valley of the Sun and found the Zombie Horde had finally deserted Dreamer’s little piece of property.  I’m guessing Eerie and Mischevious have been making tracks to the Impentrable Forest considering the path of gnawed bones littering the trail.  Have to love those Piranha Hummingbirds, they clean their dinner plates!  Not to worry, the Prankster Duo has no problem attracting new Zombies, it seems to be an inborn talent of theirs.

So after rounding up the Hellhound, I was pleased to see my Knight in Slightly Muddy Armor had managed to keep the Duo busy while I was away.  Seems there was a required marathon of movies involving a horned-helmeted blond with a facination for hammers, a green muscle head with a temper problem, and that dashing king of sarcasm who looks good in red and self perpetuating battery.  Something about all three, plus a red-head in latex and, if I do say so myself, a rather good looking archer gathering for their debut this weekend. The tickets have already been purchased–twice.

In the meantime, Snarky and I attended this conference.  Now you may wonder why two paranormal, urban fantasy writers would attend a gathering of those mavens of love and hard chests, but there are some really good workskhops at these things. Plus we were considering kidnapping a few agents and editors for our own amusement.  Since this time I wasn’t on pins and needles endlessly practicing my story pitch, I was able to enjoy the expierence.  For writers, conferences are like a red carpet gala–you get to meet the actual human that writes those books you wait on pins and needles for every Tuesday.  It can reduce a 41 year old to a 16 year old in like two minutes flat.  It’s so embarrassing!

Anyway, other than the massive amounts of information that I’m still processing, the biggest success I pulled from my three day stint was the eight hour brainstorming session Snarky and I indulged ourselves in.  What was funny was there was an actual brain storming session planned on Saturday night during the dinner.  We got a head start, because that’s just how we roll.  We headed over to the nearest barrista heaven, spent two and half hours there before realizing we might miss dinner, dashed back to the conference, gathered necessary sustanance, then hunkered down in our room and balcony and spent the next 6 plus hours taking everything that had been thrown at us and incorporating it into our WIPs (works in progress).

Doing things this way is a double edged sword.  I was having issues with Shadow’s Moon (Book 3 of the Kyn Kronicles) and by the end of the evening realized why (you really do need a strong villian for a good story!), and now all those pages I’ve accumlated are being moved to the cut pile–yes indeed, we are starting over.  Here’s hoping that since there’s a clearer picture of where we’re going and Xander’s stopped being so damn coy, it will go much faster.  Plus Snarky figured out her sticking point on her hush-hush project.  It’s hard to explain to a non-writer how much fun the expierence was because for some peeps the idead of talking through plot points, character motivation, series arcs, and personalities is just….blehh!  But for me–I LOVED IT! 

Plus it was the most awesomest thing in the world to meet both newbie and not-so-newbie writers and READERS! I swear the writing community just rocks.  Conferences are where no one gets upset if you space in the middle of a conversation, they understand sometimes those voices in your head just drown out those around you.  Plus where else could you chat about what exactly constitutes a psychopath versus a sociopath, or why corsets are a hell of a lot harder to get rid of than just “ripping” them off–think bones and damn tough material? There was even the most entertaining conversation regarding the staminia of the men of the Paranormal community versus the rakes of the historicals–truly riveting!

Now the goal is to make it to the Paranormal Conference next year because as lovely as the RWA crowd was–I think I’d like to expierence the wild, twisted worlds of the Paranorms for a bit.  Think of what it would do to my Muse!  She’d have others to play blade-darts with, they could go on Zombie hunts, and maybe torment a few demons along the way.   Who knows, maybe we’ll get to come back with new alligator boots next year! 

-Wicked

SNARK HAS BEEN RETURNED NOW BACK TO WORK

Greetings and salutations loyal followers,

As you probably know by now we found the missing Snark at the Monastery of the Werewolf Monks.  She’s still recovering from drinking all the left over Exsanguinate The Holidays from the Monk’s special reserve.  It’s taken quite a toll on her. The last time I saw her she was in the throes of the DTs.  The good news is she’s in good hands, the Swamp Thing is nursing her back to her former glory and has agreed to counsel her on substance abuse.  The bad news is we lost my muse during the search.  Wicked thought he went for the whites but Mischievous said he was heading into the cellar for amontillado.  So Mischievous and I are going to take the shortcut back to Monastery through THE IMPENETRABLE FORREST and get my muse back.  

Wish us luck because you know there are many hazards to be encountered there.  Last time we ventured there we lost several members of our group to the Killer Koalas, and the time before that we were attacked by Pirahana Humming Birds.  I’ve never seen a Black Tiger, but they say they are most ferocious.   Vampire Tarantulas  drop from the trees and suck you dry.  However it is the only way to get to the Werewolf Monastery in half a day if you don’t drive.  Dwarves aren’t especially good drivers because our feet don’t touch the pedals and we can’t see over the steering wheel.  

Before we leave I need to share with you what I’ve been up to.  I backed off work just a bit and one night I carried a legal pad and pen to bed to make some notes on an idea.  Before you could say Rumplestiltskin I  had eleven hand written pages of a story.  This is what happens when your muse comes to work and your ready for him.  I’ve since started typing it into my Mac.  The message is clear.  If a writer you want to be, then ready you are, and do not flee.  

You’ve heard this before if you write; we don’t write because we can, but because we must.

One last thing I’d like to share, I heard a speaker this weekend who said that Fear and Love are mutually incompatible.  If you fear you cannot love.   And when you love you need not fear.  So fear not.  Go forth and love your fellows.     

This week’s quote comes from SELF-PORTRAIT by David White

“I want to know if you are willing to live, day by day with the consequence of love and the bitter unwanted passion of your sure defeat.  I’ve heard, in that fierce embrace, even the gods speak of God. 

MISSING IN ACTION

Greetings and salutations oh lofty blog readers,

I hope you’ve missed me, because I’m kind of sensitive and my feelings would really be hurt if you didn’t.  I’ve been in search of the Holy Grail.  Okay, that’s not true, I’ve been deluged with work.  A bad excuse for not keeping in touch, but as wicked would say, “It is the way of my people.”  So there you have it, I was out chasing the over rated american dream; money. The good news is I’m taking my life back and step one is to get back to writing.  This is as good a place as any to start that. Besides, I missed you demented harborer’s of ghastly dreams.

So let’s catch up.  My good friend and side kick Mischievous Raven has recovered from his abduction by the The Three Misfiteers.  He should be here, but he stopped to agitate C.Rock Adile.  A worthy endeavor I might add and one he is fully capable of carrying out.  My muse has been hiding out at the Swamp Shack probably collecting unemployment and boozing it up.  That’s about to change because him and I have work to do.  I’ll be heading over there shortly to ask him to put his tool belt on.

If you’re a regular follower you may have noticed the new look. Pretty nice, huh?  Thank you Wicked for the decor.  It’s very fang shui.  If you look closely at the shack on the right you can see my place, it’s under the tangle of roots below the big tree.  I know, what your thinking.  How did I get the best location in the swamp?  It’s all in who you know.

In other news we must bid a fond farewell to Jedi Dwarf , she was called away on urgent business for the Empire, we all wish her well and of course THE FORCE IS WITH HER.  Dreamer Dwarf has joined us and I want everyone to go say hi and welcome her to the Swamp.  She is a bit squeamish about the zombie infestation so keep that on the low down. They’ll grow on her in one of two ways eventually.   She’ll get used to them or they’ll eat her brains, either way they’ll grow on her.  The Evil 7 are planning their retreat to troll mountain again this summer, so I’m studying my riddles, one must be prepared incase one encounters a troll hunting party.

If your new to the Swamp and my blog in particular, all these names and references are loosing you.  Don’t go away.  Besides discussing the on goings around the swamp I also write about writing and what I’m reading.  If you stopped by for lofty literary discussion, you’ve probably gotten lost, but don’t panic.  I urge to hang around, Fridays  are my day and it’s mostly about having fun and letting my imagination run free.  I try not to let grammar or proper word usage get in the way here.  Without going back in time and reading my older blogs I will try to bring you up to speed by filling you in on who’s who as they cross our path. For instance C. Rock Adile is a pompous, crabby, egotistical, pain in the ass who recently moved back here after losing his position with the Kings Royal News Agency.  The details are very hush hush, but rumor has it that he was caught embezzling funds.  The only thing that kept his head attached is he has a lot of dirt on the Royal Family.  You’ll learn more about him later  if  the zombies don’t catch him first.

“Hey Eerie, Wicked wants to see  you right away.  She’s waiting at The Slice Your Own Deli.”

Mischievous,slow down and say hi the our readers.

“Oh hey, good to see you.  I’m surprised you all came  back.  He’s such a slacker.”  Pointing his wing at Eerie.  “Okay, can we go now, she said it was important.  By the way, her muse is with her and you know how SHE is if you keep her waiting.  I think she hates me anyway so can we get a move on.”

Did she say what ‘s so urgent?

“Something about Snarky Dwarf losing her snark.”

That is serious.  I think I see a quest in our future.  Fly down to Swamp Shack and tell my muse to meet at the deli and tell him to bring the armored hummer.

“You got it.  I’ll see you there.  I know how you are about long goodbyes so wrap this up and get a move on.”

Just go, I’ll be right there.  Well folks you see I have an emergency to deal with so I ‘ll say goodbye here, as is my custom I’ll leave you with a quote this week it is from one of my favorite writers and a master of the short story Richard Matheson.

“What condemnation could possibly be more harsh than one’s own, when self-pretense is no longer possible?”
― Richard Matheson, What Dreams May Come: A Novel

Write On,

Eerie

Case of the missing Snark…

At the latest gathering of the Evil 7 it came to our attention that our bold whipmistress and supreme ass kicker Snarky Dwarf has suddenly *gasp* lost her snark.  The Swamp is in an uproar.  I’m not sure how we missed such a momentous disaster, but trying to retrieve that mangy feather fiend, Mischeivous from the Three Misfiteers, resisting the urge to show that pompous C. Rock Adile how lovely he’d look in boot form, and making sure to keep those damn Storm Troopers from finding Jedi Dwarf, we seemed to have lost her snark.

Although we’ve bid adieu to Jedi, we have been able to help Dreamer Dwarf get settled. I’ve managed to wrangle the Prankster Duo into keeping Eerie’s zombies occupied so Dreamer doesn’t catch on that the shuffling noises she’s been hearing aren’t the three lost pigs from the other side of the Swamp.  We all pitched in with her beautiful moat and boy is C. Rock going to be pissed when he finds out we bribed his cousins into taking up residence.  I think if we corner a few unicorns for Dreamer, she’ll be okay.  As long as we keep the zombies, the Prankster Duo, the hellhound, Eerie and the Swamp Thing away from her yard.  Maybe her white picket fence and beautifully boxed flower things will keep everyone back.  If not, that’s why we have the moat!

I was going to make my Muse and that drunken fool she’s been hanging out with over at Swamp Shack help me earlier this month, but she’s taken a beating from all the guest posts I had to throw together.  Who knew that trying to come with entertaining blog posts was almost as hard as…writing? Not me, that’s for sure.  However, I’m sure she’s back in fighting form so I sent Mischevious over to Eerie’s so we can figure out what happened to Snarky’s snark.  Between the two of us I’m sure we’ll hunt it down.

Since my Muse was able to help me carve out a good 12 pages today, I figured we’d stick with what works do a little revamping of the Swamp.  Maybe it’s the massive amount of HGTV (Hag and Gnome channel) I’ve been forced to watch late at night while the hellhound has been chasing the Zombies and Knight in slightly muddy armor has been out “raiding” with his friends until the wee hours, but it was time for a change.  Cool uh?

My To-Do list is growing:

1.  Round up Eerie and the Muses and find Snarky’s snark

2.  Do weekly rounds of guest posts at following sites (and it’s a busy week):

• 4/17   Michelle Miles’s Ye Olde Inkwell where I keep with my HGTV motif and discuss A Writer’s Dream
• 4/19  Stacey Donaldson is hosting me at The Write to Make A Living as we take a peek into the Chaotic World fo a Writer’s Mind
• 4/20  The lovely Bri Clark graciously rescheduled me over at The Belle of Boise to chat about Plot and Soap Opras
• 4/21  BK Walker has welcomed me to her Immortyl Cafe to explore how to Forge a Character

3.  Help plan the yearly trip to Troll Mountain.  I so can’t wait for this one!

4.  Keep the Prankster Duo focused for their annual Testing Games–only a few make it through with their brains intact.  Here’s hoping we’ve prepared them enough for the onslaught of data!

I think that’s it so far…more than enough to keep me busy.

Until next week…

Wicked

Mischievous is Coming Home

Greetings and Salutations Minions,

I’ve gotten word from The Three Misfiteers, they are pleased with my progress submitting their story out to literary agents.  They have agreed to set Mischievous free and we have made arrangements for the transfer.  I have the three Mischievous Raven Hoodies they requested ready to go.  For obvious reasons I cannot divulge the when or where the transfer is to take place.  They’ve assured me he is in fine spirits, but added if he doesn’t shut up soon they may have to tape his beak closed again.

Sending out the query letter has already reaped some results, as one very astute Literary Agency has requested the first 50 pages of my manuscript.  Because I am a writer this request had me first doing the dance of joy and then the march of dread, as I roller coaster through what if they don’t like it, what if there is some huge gaff on the first page, what if I’m delusional and they never really asked for it, what if the zombie horde intercepts it to pay me back for kicking them out of the Swamp at Christmas, what they hate the mailman who drops it off at their office, what if…

Sorry, I had to go take a pill.  What ifs aside, I’m combing through the first fifty pages checking for that huge gaff and the small ones too.  I couldn’t do this without the help of the other Evil Seven Dwarves.  (Yes that’s right, in case I failed to mention it with the abduction of MR and all.  Please welcome the newest of the Seven Evil Dwarves, ???Dwarf.  I know what your thinking seven and one make eight, but you would be wrong because we will always remain the Evil Seven, so just live it)  As I was saying I couldn’t do this without them.  So a big thanks as always for their support.

Our latest dwarf  is a wonderful writer with a sense of humor who hasn’t chosen her dwarf name yet.  We’ll have her in for an interview and she can tell you all about herself soon.

In other news around the Swamp.  The annual celebration of George Romero’s birthday is

Preparations for George Romero's birthday celebration are all almost complete.

tomorrow.  That’s right February the Fourth has snuck up me again.  (I haven’t done any shopping yet. I guess I’ll be giving away a lot of Mischievous Raven Wear)  In spite of MR’s abduction, plans for the celebration went on around here as they do every year .  The Three Misfiteers have agreed to have MR home in time for the party.  We’ve opened the gates to the Swamp and allowed some of the shamblers in for the festivities as long as they promise not to eat anyone during the party.  Slice your own Deli is catering the event of course.  And this year The Swamp Shack is setting up a complimentary open bar.  I hope the Muses will behave themselves, but honestly there isn’t much chance of that, especially with an open bar.

The Drop Dead Inn still has rooms available if you want to hang around until tomorrow for the party.  It promises to be better than ever since we’ll be celebrating Mr. Romero’s birthday and MR’s return home.  You really shouldn’t miss it.  Troll Security has been contracted to keep a lid on things, so bring some riddles with you in case you find yourself in scrape.

I’ve got to go.  It’s time to bring Mischievous home.  I’ll see you all next week in the interim I’ll leave with these words again this is from The Three Misfiteers, this is another one of Frank’s fortunes from the chinese restaurant.

“To know another is not to know his face, but to know his heart.”

Write On,

Eerie

 

Life Interruptus…

I managed to drag and beat into a readable pulp a whole whopping SEVENpages of book 3.  I spent backbreaking hours sucking back frappacinnos as I hunched over my most precious Macbook Air with my ears plugged into my current playlist to bring those pages into the world kicking and screaming.  Exhausted I went home, corralled the Prankster Duo and knight in slightly muddy armor from the hypnotic trance of the latest video craze of SWTOR and we were sitting around the table to enjoy the wonderful world of Pizza Hut, when an almight noise emerged from the night.

Knight and I jumped up, grabbed our sharp pointy and edgy things, set the hellhound to watch the Duo and emerged onto the porch.  The unholy wails were coming from Eerie’s side of our little enclave.  For a moment I was worried his undead pets had slipped their leashes, but it was much, much worse than that.

Eerie’s got a steady head on his shoulders…most times, so this very explosively loud outburst was not normal.  In our Swamp not normal generally means mud is about to hit the fan.  I left Knight to stand guard and slid into the early evening to find out what the hell was going on.  It wasn’t long before Snarky and her whip were imitating a shadow to my left and Quirky and his quarterstaff took his spot on my left.  That pompous soon-to-be-new-pair-of-boots, aka Mr. C. Dial was lounging in his front yard, tsking about how he had been told this was such a nice neighborhood, such a pity. 

Ignoring him, our little trio made it to Eerie’s place to find Smokey trying to force a bowl of…well…something into Eerie’s shaking hands. The poor guy looked like a magnitude 10.0 was happening under his hairy feet.  A whisper of sound announced Jedi’s arrival and down the trodden path a pair of headlights bounced our way.  Great, the Muses were heading in.  Good grief, it was a frickin’ party!

It took a bit, but we finally got Eerie to tell us what was up. 

Mischevious was gone…flown the coop…flocked away!

His collection of shiny bits was still scattered around his perch, and we couldn’t finop…flocked away.

d any sign of forcible abuduction, but Eerie’s convinced he’s been raven-napped.  He’s even posted a rewarde for info.

Suspects are not exactly littering the ground, but personally, after seeing the little tete-a-tee between our Raven and Pompous Ass, it wouldn’t surprise me if that walking luggage set had something to do with it.  I told the old man with the tool belt to take a break on the flask thing and sent my muse with him to go listen to the talk down at the Swamp Shack.  Maybe we’d get lucky and the two of them will hear something.

In the meantime, I’m keeping my eye on that yes-man down the road, just in case. 

If you have any info on Mischevious, do me a favor and let Eerie know? He’s at 777-7777.

As for the writing thing, as I trudged home it hit me, those seven pages…yeah, they weren’t going to work.  During the walk home, I steamed and stewed but at least I know where I’m going to actually start now. Problem is, Shadow’s Soul needs to make it’s way to my editor.  I haven’t been very good at multi-tasking with this third book, so as frustrating as it is, it’s going to the back burner while I stop procrastinating and buckle down for editing hell.  A few more tweaks and it should be a done deal.  Then on to book 3….

Wicked

MUSING AROUND

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Hey folks, how’s it hanging?  As you can see Eerie is once again AWOL.  He claims to be writing with his muse down at The Swamp Shack.  I’m not altogether sure any writing gets done down there. I do know a lot of drinking gets done and that worries me.  Don’t tell anyone, but I think  Eerie may have a problem he hasn’t come to terms with.

I know he’s looney-tunes, everyone knows that.  I’m talking about his drinking problem.  Anyway I think his muse is a bad influence on him.  And if Wicked’s muse is with him, forget about it.  That woman scares the shine from my feathers.  I’m telling you, I won’t go back there after last time.  And the booze they serve, anything called Swamp Head just can’t be good for you.

Now let’s get down to business shall we.  Two weeks ago I suggested that you all go check out my new line of fashions and accessories EVERYTHING RAVEN, at mischievous.raven@yahoo.com.  I must say that I was disappointed at the less than enthusiastic response.  So today we will be having a little fashion show.  My assistants, the trolls are eagerly waiting to encourage you with your purchases.  Kiosks are set up at every exit for your shopping convenience.  As a special one time offer today only, you will receive  a free can of Troll Repellent with every purchase.

Step right up, everyone’s a winner, bargains galore.  That’s right you too can be the proud owner of

The quality goes in before the name goes on.

the lovely ensemble being modeled by none other than Karlie Kloss.  Next up Miranda Kerr is showing off the sexier side of Raven Wear with this one piece swimsuit.  Don’t be fooled by cheap imitations, these are originals folks.  Batteries not included.

“Hey MR.”

Get away from kid, you bother me.

“Urgent phone call from Eerie sir.”

Oh, you better put him through.  What’s that Eerie?  Your breaking up.  Can you hear me now?  Eerie?  Eerie?

I think I finally lost him.  It looks like we’ll have to cut the fashion show short.   We’re having a going out of business sale, everything must go.  50 % off original retail price.  Trolls are standing by to take your orders.

“It’s unethical to rub the phone on your chest when you’re talking, Raven.”  C. Rock Adial shakes his head.

Oh, hey C. Rock. It’s impolite to eavesdrop on someone else’s phone conversation.

“I don’t think Eerie will see it that way when he hears of this blatant commercialization of his blog.”

I see.  It’s like that is it.  Maybe you’re interested in some complimentary Raven Wear.

“I cannot be bought so cheaply.  50% of the take might dim my memory.”

30% of the net.

“40% of the net and a case of the Werewolf Monks Exsanguinate the Halls wine.”

You drive a hard bargain C R.

“I served his majesty for many years.  One is apt to pick up a few things along the way.”

Yes.  I bet that’s not all you picked up,

“Are you accusing me of common thievery.”

Not at all.  I’m sure there was nothing common about it.  If you’ll excuse me I’ve got to get this show packed up incase Eerie decides to come back early.

Eerie picked out this weeks quote before he left for the shack.  Don’t forget Everything Raven is always available at mischievous.raven@yahoo.com

“Dreams are the souls pantry.  Keep it well stacked and your soul will never hunger.”

~Cindy Williams

Shop On,

Mischievous Raven