MIST-ERIOUS GOINGS ON AT THE SWAMP

Greetings and Salutations loyal readers of the blog at the bog,

As you can see were late and I do apologize for any inconvenience.  The Zombie Horde has kept me busy all week.  It seems that they are hungrier than usual.  It’s just one more strange thing that’s been going on around here.  I went over to The Swamp Shack to track down my muse.  Upon arrival I was informed that none of the muses have been around which really has the bartender upset because the inventory of Swamp Head is backing up.  After purchasing a couple of refreshments for the lonely bartender, he informed us that he’s done some checking around. The muses are not at any of the local drinking establishments.  Another stance turn of events.  Mischievous and I went over to my muses home, a sprawling man cave complete with sports memorabilia flat screens TVs and a layer of smoke that will give any nonsmoker a coughing fit for weeks.  Today the smoke smells sweet with a bitter under tone that sticks to the back of my throat.  Since Mischievous is a raven and reacts badly to second-hand smoke he waited outside.  As usual that knife wielding red-head was there as well as The Snark,  They were sitting around laughing hysterically at one of those funny video shows.  I’m not a fan of watching people make fools of themselves on TV (mostly because I get top watch myself first hand without the slo-mo replay).

“Eerie check this out.”  The Snark grabs the remote and backs it up to a video they had just watched.

The three of them are rolling on the floor laughing by now and to be honest (although I’m not a fan) I’ve seen funnier bloopers or whatever they are.  At the end The Snark backs it up again.

“How many times have you watched this same clip?” I ask,  I’m thinking twice was too many.

My muse fires up the big hooka in the middle of the room and passes the bit around.  ”I don’t know what day is it?”

“It’s Friday.”  They all start laughing again.  I mean rolling on the floor, knee slapping, belly laughs.  I’m trying not to get indignant here, but they’re just acting silly.

The Snark shrugs her shoulders and the Red Head (sans any sharp instruments by the way) gets real serious.  ”That would be three…”she can’t finish because she’s laughing again.

“You watched that stupid clip three times since I’ve been here.”

“Three days!”  The Snark blurts out and off they go again.

“I’m worried about what is going on around here and you three have been doing what?  Watching the same stupid video for three days.”

“Nah,” my muse finally speaks up.  ”We had to run over to the swamp things place to pick some of her flowers a couple of times.”

“You picked her flowers and she didn’t mind.”

“Nah she was real cool huh guys?”

“Yeah,” Red says backing up the video yet again.  ”She was real cool.  That guy with nice skin was there  too.”

“Nice skin?”  I’m getting more concerned by the minute.  ”Who has nice skin?”

“The guy with all the teeth.  What’s his name?”

“You mean C. Rock Adile?”

“Yeah that’s the one.  C. Rock really rocks.”  and now she’s off to a giggling fit.

“Have you noticed the Zombies are eating everything in site ?”

“Let ‘em alone.  Live and let unlive I always say.”  My muse Mr. Intolerant says.  ”You want a hit?”

“Nah, I’ll pass.  What is that your smoking anyway?”

“Swamp Things flowers, duh.”  Red giggles again.

I’ve never seen her giggle and I’ve never seen her without at least two sharp knives.  This is going on my list of strange occurrences.

“Mind if I take one with me?”  no one hears me because they are watching the same stupid clip again.  I take a flower and my leave.

“What did you find out Eerie?”  Mischievous asked as I exit with a cloud of bitter-sweet smoke.

“I’ll explain on the way.  We’ve got to get this flower to the Werewolf Monks for analysis.”

“Not another trip through the Impenetrable forest!”

“Nah,” I start giggling.  ”Let’s borrow the armored Hummer”

“Are you serious?  No.  You wouldn’t do that.  He’d kill us, besides you can’t drive.”

Now I’m laughing uncontrollably.  ”They had the funniest video on in there.  You should have seen it.  This guy landed right on his nads.”

“What are you doing?”  Mischievous asked.

“Help me out here.  I’ll work the pedals you steer.”

“I don’t think this is a good idea Eerie.”

“Don’t be such a chicken.  Now that’s funny.  A raven who’s a chicken.  You get it, huh?”

“Yeah, I got it.  Like I’ve never heard a bird joke before.”

“Okay,okay.  When is a raven not a raven?  When he’s chicken.”

“Folks, I must apologize for Eerie.  I don’t know what’s going on but I’m going to get to the bottom of it.  I know he doesn’t drink, but he’s acting like he got faced in there.  so I’m going to take this flower to the monks because that’s what he wanted to do before he lost his mind.  You’ll have to keep an eye on him while I fly over to the Monastery.  I’ll be back as soon as I can.  I’ll leave you with this quote

 

Come in here, dear boy, have a cigar. You’re gonna go far, fly high, You’re never gonna die, You’re gonna make it if you try; They’re gonna love you…And did we tell you the name of the game, boy, We call it Riding the Gravy Train.

 Pink Floyd